Decapitation In the Style of Calvin and Hobbes
In Cold Blood
If you have to drive in snow, please be on the lookout for snowmen. They lack both fine motor control and a good sense of hearing. This can result in tragic accidents.
Words: Peter Orosz | Pictures: Natalie Polgar + Peter Orosz
It has snowed six inches overnight and how awesome is that! In a frenzy you dig for warm clothes and a toboggan but then you realize a late winter day with low-hanging clouds and intermittent flurries is just not the same when you’ve grown up.
Not when you have to get to work in a city notorious for its erratic snowplow schedule. On winter tires run down to the very treads.
Speeding down the hill, it is only when you hear the inimitable thud of a snowman hit by your car’s grille that you realize just how quickly these guys emerge after snowfall. Years of postnatal development compress into a span of but a few hours for snow humans.
Yet tragically, their giant, frozen bodies do not come with either fine motor control or adequate hearing. And once you get out of the car to survey the damage and hope for the best, you realize that their cervical vertebrae and neck musculature also leave a lot to be desired.
∞ Published on Monday, February 23rd, 2009